I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as a father and mother, friend, teacher, and much more to be telling this person to be here and nowhere else, and don’t go anywhere. As if there are set and strict rules of restriction and how going anywhere will result in an output of punishment and within my input. And how that has gotten me nowhere and including for my child as if It were to be the best thing to do, when in reality, it was only making another person or this person as a child to be rebellious and not conceive to perceive our rules as set and hard in stone. When in reality, we could’ve gotten another stone and made the rules different, instead we were just too blind to the fact, that being strict and not letting my wife or husband, boyfriend, girlfriend or anyone to not go anywhere. Just because I am concerned for their safety, when in reality, I am only concerned for my safety in the mind and safety for my own mind to not deal with anything tragic if it were to even happen. And how being so set and strict as if I am and how I am restricting myself and my son and child within his mind, as my mind is restricted to be strict to a set way and doing and how we never allowed and I never allowed anything to be flexible. It was always a set in hard stone type of thing and nobody ever went anywhere and did anything because I was afraid for my child to have friends, and it would severely fuck my child up, just because of the other unstable kids and children as well that never had a better way of treatment than we have. When in reality, it is not what’s best for all, nor is it for my child, how i have no clue and am and was and still too blind to the fact to what the real truth if flexibility really is, instead of having some type of hard stop and hard rule of anything. And how i never even explained myself and if my child ever went out to a party or did anything to smoke weed, drink or do anything or smoke cigarettes like I did, it would’ve been a detrimental pool party to no man’s land and no man’s mind should ever be participating in something that I don’t do. And how I have found myself putting hard rules on myself and how it restricted me into doing whatever i want to do in my life and how nothing ever really happened for the better. It only got worse as I restrict myself and my wife and child for the worst, i never really considered it, because the only best way and only way, I ever knew, was to be strict and express myself in negative connotations and this horrible character that is strict and restrictive to anything and anyone, no matter who it may be, just because I am so self conscious and insecure of my own ways and being to how my parents of mother and father have taught me from both sides. From generation to generation and how it was yet to be forgiven, up until now.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be for myself whenever I talk with my friends or a girl that i like or whomever, or whatever, I feel that I have to have the need of not wanting to let her or another friend go anywhere. And have to always reply back to me as if I am not comfortable being by myself and being patient with the person for whomever it is, whether it is my wife, significant other or anyone. To be restricted to me and for me to strict to them and to myself is having hard fast rules and hard rules set in stone and not realising that I could just go get another stone and make rules that are flexible, but I was too blind to realise that we never stood up as one and equals and even I myself could never stand up for myself as an one and equal individual, I’ve always for some reason saw myself as inferior because of how my parents had hard and fast strict rules and how they always told me to never go anywhere, but I always rebelled. And now I am finding myself doing hard fast and strict rules to others and even other kids, other people, women, men, or whomever, to make me feel safe and have everyone be with me and not away from me. Just because I am not comfortable with myself and have to be strict with myself and disciplined in the wrong way as if it were to be the right way. When in reality, it is not, nothing but a fad and facade of a made up lie to make others be with me and not feel so safe and free as they ought to be and how I was never free truly at all either. And how I thought freedom was just a facade and a fad, because of restrictions towards money and how I never could get it, because I didn’t have the skills and realisations and even the vocabulary at the time and even up until now to realise that I am at a stand still in my own limitations. That true living change is the way, and not some change of what I’ll say and end up doing something totally different, which is pretty stupid if you ask me or anyone. They probably wouldn’t even question it at the time, nor would I.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to restrict and to be strict to myself as how and others of my parents and other people have been strict to me as if there was no flexibility and just hard fast rules and hard rules of nothing to be sought after for. And it was just a straight no and how I have found myself doing the same thing to myself as they were doing to me, as if I haven’t gotten a clue of what I was imposing and being an imposter and poser to a lie that isn’t even real and true, it was just based on fear and fear of loss and how this is in reality another form and reality of fear of loss and wanting others to be with me. When i am not with myself all the time, and how that is the case to be blinded to and how it is not what’s best for me, nor is it what’s for anyone at all either, whatsoever.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself as a girlfriend to this man, who is trying to hold me back, restricted and was always strict and didn’t want me to go anywhere and how I felt I was being held down. And how I didn’t realise, there wasn’t supposed to be any flexibility in a relationship and as if this flexibility and only restriction and how no one themselves can do anything freely and openly and freedom with to do whatever. To travel or do anything of that nature, and how i found him saying no to me, because he could never express himself in the best ways possible with me, and nor could I, because I asked why. And if I did, I would fear getting yelled at, when in reality, I was yelled at it he past by my parents as mother and father, because they never saw flexibility within themselves, and nor within me and how I found myself being a fear monger of that and didn’t even bother to answer back. And thought myself to be inferior, when I could’ve seen this wonderful person who I thought he was to be flexible, instead I just didn’t know what he was saying and understanding of what he was saying. I just thought it was a hard fast no, and it was that way at first, I just never bothered to question it, because I felt the urge and fear of the negative energy that was conjuring within me from the gut and stomach and up to my chest. That I didn’t know what to do, and never bothered to question and stand up for myself. Instead I backed down and thought I was feeling and being just inferior and saw him as superior, when in reality, we were both one and equals. Contrary to that, we both never saw each other as one and equals, when it could’ve been that way at the starting point first, but the starting point was fucked, so we never lasted together as boyfriend and girlfriend. We never really stood the test of time between us, and therefore, we never lasted and had to depart, and how I had done the same thing to him. Wanting him to be here, not being comfortable with myself, being so self conscious and strict to him every time he wanted to do something and go out and play and be at the park with others, while i was just at home at my own home. Doing nothing and fucking around as if i was just a blind idiot, thinking this is the way a relationship should and ought to be, when in reality, it was not that way, i just never could understand the full and deep truth and the simplicity of it, no matter how hard i tried to stop myself from being strict and so needy. I just had to do it, and the more I did it, the more he ignored me, because energetically or whatever, the roles have been switched. When in reality imprinted lies and imposed lies have been transferred, and we were both affected for the worst, and how never made it work for each other. And soon miscommunication and loss of communication was an end result, and we never talked to each other ever again and now conversations are never to be seen with the light of day. It’s never there anymore, i’m sorry. I still love you, but I have to move on, it’s best for the both of us and realise what we need to do, in order to become better in the next relationship, by bettering and improving ourselves, if it were to even be that way at all whatsoever.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to be strict and not explain why I have to say no with a hard fast stop and hard rule to think that it is the best way to do so. When in reality, we both as couples or anyone at all, have both and different definitions of no, and how we were so insufficient in processing the ability of information due to the lack of vocabulary and instability that was never even there in the first place. And even before the starting point ever happened, it was fucked anyway. We never sat down together to truly explain why what we did, and how we did it, we were just being self dishonest and not truthful to ourselves and with each other as anyone, parent, mother, father, significant other. And how it all came down crashing and now if we are still together, ten great, if not, that’s okay, too and if we want to make it work out the better, let’s do it, because we’re already together. And if we resist each other and more change doesn't really occur, then there has to be something to be solved and given to realise, before it's too late. And how in reality, we are already late anyway to come to realise this now. However, if we forgive each other now, we will be much better off for true growth, and stability and within development for the better and when there is development, we can not forget about stability as well.
I forgive myself for accepting and allowing myself to not realise that when i say no to something or say something in a different way to consider a different option, i don’t explain why to my spouse, significant other, wife, husband or anyone. And how I need to not explain myself, and just quickly assume and so quick to deny myself and the other person to even get an explanation and how I need to assume that my partner, parent, mother, father, child is assuming that what I mean is what I mean. And now an assumption builds with their unconscious and subconscious mind and to the conscious act to be so so self conscious to the point. They and I will be insecure to what isn’t even here to begin with at all whatsoever. How we both never voiced our needs, our wants, or anything, of objections, desires, wants and needs, and how we never questioned them for and to ourselves and with each other. To help each other investigate the bullshit that we have accepted and allowed, it was all an atrocity before it all happened until this very moment and time. We never bothered to question anything, because we were both or too busy being within our secret mind and was always assuming and having assumptions to what the other person truly meant or what we meant was a hard fast rule and hard stop and set in stone and slammed it through the table and broke the damn glass. Without anyone ever explaining what is hard or not hard at all, and how no one was flexible but always had a hard fast in their secret mind and my own secret mind too at the time and even now as it is. And how I realised that it is not what’s best for me, not what’s best for her or him, not what’s best for my wife, not my husband or anyone to begin with. And how assumptions will kill everything, if it is not investigated properly and effectively for the better.
When and as I see myself wanting to be strict and restrict myself and others and my significant other and my business partners, and or anyone at all whatsoever, I stop and breathe and redirect to what is best for all in flexibility and proper tactful decision to do what is best with others and for myself as well for the better. I realise that trying to be strict to others in reality put another re as repeat to restrict myself to strict myself to what life really is and how I was never able to move out and be seen in the light of my own light and be with others. And how others have seen the light of day, because of hard fast and hard rules set in stone, that were never flexible and were ever to be seen at all whatsoever.
When and as I see myself being strict with other kids and other people, I stop and breathe, and let them do what they need to do and help them understand what is best and reason for it that is of common sense and stability. I realize that being strict to another, is how we would do it to others and that will impose a poser of being an imposter of what is not even us, and myself, and how we have accepted and allowed such a thing to be true, when in reality, it was all a lie, nothing real. It was just taught and assumed as truth for lie, and lie for truth just to get what I wanted or anyone to not get them to get what they wanted. Because I only did it in my own self interest so they won’t get hurt or have anything that is beneficial or not beneficial at all either, no matter the circumstance at all whatsoever.
When and as I see myself wanting to restrict others so they can not get what they want, I stop and breathe and redirect to reason and what’s best. I realise that trying to restrict others is in reality trying to restrict myself just because I am concerned for their safety by being so self conscious to think that, “oh this is the best way, because I am feeling pretty damn self conscious today, why not restrict others as i am restricted myself?”, and how I found that to be utter bullshit. That it is not true, and the consequences cannot be reversed, unless it is forgiven through self forgiveness and self correction as well for the better. And how this is held on lie, because we feared and I feared, of even ever letting go of being strict to myself and to others as well, as if there wasn’t even any type of flexibility of anything at all whatsoever, even though i am a flexible person myself.
When and as I see myself trying to and attempting to have a hard fast and hard stop set in stone rule, I stop and breathe, and redirect to do what is best with reason and common sense for the better. I realise that there are no hard stone and hard fast rules, that it is all just a manipulative way of living and way of doing to believe such a lie from a detrimental person and for me to accept that, is isn’t going to help me any further or anything at all whatsoever.
I commit myself to express myself in flexibility and to do what is best and express it from myself through within my actions and words to express what flexibility really is. And how we and I, myself can learn from anyone and anybody, and be able to discern what people are saying, whether it is truth or not, or just plain contradictions for control. And to challenge anyone who ever tries to restrict me and be strict to me, with respect and dignity, that no person has a say over anyone at all whatsoever. That we are free to do what we want, and reason with it, if it is best with self honesty or not at all with common sense as well for the better. For as I see myself as breath and life and life awareness resonance to improve and adapt for the better!
I commit myself to express to my children and my wife, that flexibility is okay, and good, and to reason it with common sense and to see if it best within self honesty to why what we want to do and if it is good, then we will do so in the moment or hereafter or whenever is best with reason. And to help my employees, directors, salespersons, team, senior partners, customers, clients, and anyone to help them understand to do what is best within what flexibility truly is and how we can do it within self honesty and really question why we want what we want and why do we want to do that. And if it is best, and with self honesty and reason to see ahead with common sense of the situation, then we shall do it, with growth and reason and common sense for the better. For as I see myself, as life and life resonance awareness to improve and adapt for the better.
I commit myself to write self forgiveness to forgive myself of what is not best within me and to realise them through self realisations statements and breathing statements to redirect to do what is best for all and for myself as well for the better. And to realise the reactions that I had that weren't in my best interest and within hat to breathe and be aware and here as breath, and within hat i commit myself to write self commitment statements. To re-correct myself into life and what is best for me and how I conduct myself and my day and how I interact with others and to truly live the living change. With the tools of TechnoTutor, books, support, groups of people that are of commonality and who have what I want and not just some person who is filling a loss of being a philosopher to oblivion for what they think failure is or what achievement even is. And in reality it is the information, but if no results show, then it is not worth it or even merit to listen to the person. And to live the living change for the better, as I re-correct myself to become my best self for the better, for as I seem self as life and life resonance awareness and breath to improve and adapt for the better for my super super super super super success!
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